Two lives slammed together
A happy collision
Two hearts
Gleefully fused like
Metal to metal in a crash
Instead of blood on the pavement
There is a mish mash of
Knick knacks and
Furniture that cost nothing
Fender bender of love

I remember walking down the street to that tune, one summer so many years ago with a person who doesn't exist
I didn't make him happy when skies were grey
Nobody could
Grey was his wish
Motive and observation
Blood, tears, and bile
A lie of a hum
The pain of history is that it takes decades to change
And yes, it does change

It's like the Seven Year Itch
But without the Seven Years

What do I want?
Passion instead of tolerance

Enliven my flesh please
Pique my interest

God, do SOMETHING

Friday

I'm sorry I yelled at you
Cried at you
Bitched and cried some more

I was feeling unbelievably awful
Sick
And hopeless

Thank you for being there
Warm and true
Thank you for opening your arms and heart
For me

Saturday

I was still feeling rotten
Couldn't do anything
For anyone
Even if I had wanted to

Thank you for talking with me
Laughing and loving

Sunday

I'm sorry for waking you
No doubt worrying your poor, dear heart
For being short with you, and curt

I was panicked, stricken, and sick
In pain and alone

Thank you for promising me
For helping me and regarding me

Thank you for walking to the hospital
For staying with me
And by me
Holding me and reassuring me

Thank you for sleeping by me
Comforting me and caring for me

Monday

What a holiday

Thank you for waking with me
Rested and singing

Thank you for another trip to the hospital
For joking with me and being silly
Even while I was stressed from my mother
And I know you weren't happy either

Thank you for wishing me well
For making me smile in a personal Hell

Thank you for loving me
For healing me
For you

I love you, my sweetie, the sweetest taste of life and love amidst the bitterness

He is no David
I understand this fact and it is irrelevant
He makes me feel warm and safe
Beautiful and loved
Most importantly
He makes me feel

Momo has been dead for a year. It doesn't seem like it's been that long. I can still feel his bony brow and soft, floppy ears. I can still hear him fall up the stairs. Summer is coming and it reminds me of the long hours he'd spend lying in the sun, so still and calm and wise-looking, like a furry monk in meditation, at one with the earth and her creatures, butterflies dancing on his ribs.

I suppose nothing is worse than quitting
An effort may as well be involved
This complacency of my resolve
How disgusting

I am unwilling to erase these poems, yet
For them to remain unfinished, unsung, uninspiring...
Just seems so shameful
I can't do that to my words

They are a part of me

Promise of love
Hope of moving forward
AND A POETRY BLOG

It can be done

Resolution on the back burner in favour of warm snuggles
For this, I am not sorry

Somehow this blog feels like a chore
Every day
Be sure to write your lines

"I will not forget to blog
I will not forget to blog
I will not..."

How can I sit at the computer and compose what I will not enjoy, when there are loving arms and smiling love waiting for me elsewhere?

Happiness can be so fickle
The purveyor of mine is staid and true
It can be a raving river or just a trickle
We can share it, me and you

Can you grow into love?
Whether for a partner or the man above?
Feel indifferent one day and bursting with joy the next?
Have a stiff upper lip and be as sappy as the rest?
Simultaneously want to remain solitary and plan a romantic evening?
Growl on the phone and the next moment you're beaming?

Trying again
This time will be better than the last

Tiny kitten in big, warm arms
Whiskers quivering
Searching for a kiss
So big, so small
Human, feline
An unlikely family